In the last four and a half years I have been working on understanding what I truly wanted to use my voice for. What is my message? What purpose do I serve?
It has always been my calling to become an entrepreneur. I have been both unsuccessful and successful in my ventures – all leading most recently to this passion project. One of the most valuable lessons taught to me in the last few years is to be consistently investing in my growth as a person. I came to understand this doesn’t just mean with self-development books or training from the greats. There is so much value in good relationships, good nourishment, good movement, and good healing. If I practiced good habits in each of those areas then I would be successful in my life.
It became clear that I needed to donate or throw away those old raggedy (insert everything one might have here that is old and raggedy) and spend the time and money investing in quality clothes, books, cookware, furniture, etc. Are you like me? Have you ever found yourself hovering over that “buy now” button at the check out screen with your cart full of something special for yourself? Ever had a hard time committing to hitting that?
Take a minute to stop and listen to the voices in your head.
Your mindset here is a checkpoint. Find clarity here.
We can say some pretty outrageous things to ourselves when we’re not paying attention.
Everyone has a narrative that plays on autopilot – I am so grateful I have taken the time to tune in and establish a more purposeful self-talk instead.
Many years ago I began taking an inventory and redirecting. Instead of allowing myself to say things like, “You can’t do that, you’ll never be enough, you’re scared and it will never work”, I would change the outlook and ultimately the outcome, “Let’s learn a new skill and find out how this can be done!”.
Building good habits starts long before you see any results. I felt like a failure many times, shed many tears, climbed many mountains and lost many a night sleep over the stress of decisions I’d made, hoping they were the right ones.
If you know me personally you might know that both Colin and I are big believers in manifestation and the law of attraction. This was something that took us a long time to realize the potential of and that it existed for anyone. one thing to attract what you desire into your life but it’s a whole other thing to say yes to the opportunity when it does, seemingly, land in your lap. What I mean is, nothing ever truly happens “out of nowhere”. A thought, a desire, a comment in passing – this all sends vibrations out into the world. And just like in the cartoons, the vibrations you send out are echoed back to you. You don’t have to believe in anything for this to be true. It’s just how it works.
Now, let’s consider this self talk again. The fact that your narrative runs on ‘autopilot’ is not necessarily a problem. The problem, however, could be the pilot.
Pick a new pilot with a wicked self-image, more confidence, and charisma, and voila! Set her (or him!) in that plush, comfortable seat, and buckle up before hitting that auto button again. Imagine your success rate now. As a confident pilot, nowhere is too far, even if you’ve never flown there before. This is what happens when you invest in good habits.
There is a kind of freedom you can’t find anywhere else when you begin to control the direction of your own plane.
I have a six-month-old daughter at the time of my writing this blog and I have said to her since birth, “ your life, your rules!”. I very much need for her to know that she is the creator in charge of her happiness. It’s important to me that I share this message with you, too.
I quit that bartending job. I started freelance writing which was a huge flop. Back to school, I went, I started a new business by accident and then I got married, started another new business (this one stuck!) and moved to our dream retire location some 20 years ahead of schedule. Why wait? In the time span listed just above was a matter of about 4 years and in that time I also addressed many relationship issues from family to friends and even the one I had with myself. I was a mess. I made better habits with the food I was nourishing my body with and began working on some serious trauma with an amazing Doctor of Chinese Medicine who helped me to release old patterns and center my energy again.
After many years of actively pursuing that better quality life, I found myself courageous enough to begin sharing who I was and what I had been through.
The effect you have on others is the most valuable currency there is– Jim Carrey
When people reached out in response to my sharing I was overwhelmed by the messages. So many others could see and feel themselves in my stories. My perspective on a certain stance I took helped to solidify a decision they were about to make. There were times I received messages thanking me for allowing others to open up their hearts to forgiveness and healing.
When I realized my courage and vulnerability could help others I was inspired to do more and let’s face it, I had a lot I could share. How much was too little? How much was too much? Did quantity matter? Would it matter if I was courageous in sharing trauma and grief in one area of my life but not another?
Through recent business training I saw for the first time just where my passion truly lies.
I want to connect with people – men and women – who are ready to do better in their lives in spite of trauma, in spite of background or any other reason you could have to not believe in yourself as a mother, father, wife, husband, leader, or just plain successful person. I recognized that I could help people connect to faith in themselves by sharing the faith I’d found by believing in myself. I’m not a therapist – I’m just a fellow human who has been through a lot of trauma and has never let it stop me from going after living an extraordinary life.
The Good Habit is a project where I am able to do just that.
I am committed to connecting with people looking to break free from their trauma traps. People who want to focus on healing their bodies and minds by putting in the effort to learn how they function when nourished with good food and good positive thoughts. I want to connect with people who are looking for healing on all levels – all by creating good habits.
These are all subjects I spend hundreds if not thousands of hours studying, researching, and talking to others about. These are areas I have put time, effort, blood, sweat, and tears into. I want to go deep. I want to bridge the gap between fear and faith with other people by sharing my struggles and my healing journey.
So that’s exactly what I’ll do.